Mommyhood

I struggle a lot with being a single mom.  To some it may seem I have this down pat but honestly, I'm just learning as the days go by. It's tough. I'm grateful to have my son. It's difficult though when you don't know what to do for him or how to help him. He is currently struggling with some things right now. First, stories regarding his Dad and what his little mind thought it was. Then as time went on, relationships that ended that affected him and it manifested itself this year. We have had a lot of transition in 2018 and it was difficult for him to adjust. I figured that would be the case. However, others opinions were, of he will be fine. Kids adjust quickly. They don't! Children loves a routine! I know for a fact my son does, so all the interruption in our lives during the past year and a half has been hard. I pray for him and with him, cry with him and for him,  speak to him,  discipline him, but this week, I honestly just felt helpless. I got uncles, grandparents, and aunties involved but overall this is a process I wasn't ready for. I'm hoping, over time, things will get better. Until then, I'll continue to reassure him that God and I will forever be his constant.

Hope Deferred...

I wonder why God has me in a certain season. I'm currently in one I don't fully understand or grasp and I would love for it to come to a head. Or to at least understand why I'm in this current season. Lord forgive my impatience. God told me something this morning. It does not only makes sense to me but it quite frankly contradicts things currently. It is quite frustrating (in my flesh) for God to tell you something that is supposed to come to pass and it seems like you are further and further from His promises. Of course, I know His promises are yes and Amen and He doesn't lie nor repents. But God, I have no idea what You are doing! The situation, to me, is dead. However, God has a way of bringing certain things back to life that we ourselves could never see nor understand. Maybe one day, I will get my answer. Until then, I'll continue to seek Him and His promises. The ones that are coming to pass, I'll continue to trust and believe in that. The ones, however, that are still in the works I'll just leave it with You (no matter how difficult it is to me) and trust, that as always, You will have the final say. Amen.

Friendships

Hello readers! Happy New Year to all! It's been a pretty busy several weeks for me. I have been in transition and trying to get life in place for my son and myself! I just wanted to share some thoughts I had this morning about friendship. 

We all have them. I hope everyone has a few good friends, at least. I had a conversation with my son about friends and how to know who is and who isn't your friend. He is only 8. At 8, that innocence won't let you see through someone else's true intentions. In conversation, I held my hand up and explained to him that as he gets older, his true friends will be counted on his one hand.

It got me to thinking about my own friendships over the years. I have some friends that I've known and been tight with since I was a little girl. In my 33 years of living, they have shown what true friendship is like. Then I've had friendships that have grown apart. Though it hurt, God does know what's best for us and what we need in every season. Speaking of seasons, I had quite a few seasonal friendships. Unfortunately, because I hold on so tightly to people, the fall out was pretty bad. Overall, they aren't bad people.  The friendship for what it was, was great. It may not have lasted forever but it was necessary for the time and place we were all in.

Overall, cherish each friendship. Know who is truly your friend and who isn't. And most importantly, take away the lessons you need from them.  And finally, the true friends you have, don't let them go.